With Care Ride the Goodnight

It takes a lot of effort to keep this from being a political blog.

I read and watch the news so frequently that my wife has had to install a 'no politics' policy on the weekends. Every day, either I or someone I know makes a comment about the cost of gasoline, food, war, etc. (Yes, the cost of gasoline is a political issue.) My 2-year-old, in her free time (which is all of her time, by the way), has decided to make up a song called "Bo Rock Obama" that she periodically sings around the house because she likes the way the name sounds. It's gotten a little ridiculous. With all this political exposure, and the fact that this website tends to be about whatever the fuck I'm thinking about that day, the fact that I've managed to avoid being a full-time 'pundit' at all is a minor miracle.

So, given the restraint I'm showing... I'm going to give myself a pass and make one more political-ish comment then move on.

In my zeal for becoming a governmentally obsessed douchebag, I've mentally started kicking around the idea of running for something relatively innocuous, like the state House or something, then publically (online!) publishing my vote on every resolution that comes up and the reasons I voted that way. I'd have an open online dialogue with the folks in my district and, generally, try and apply a level of transparency and access to politics that, currently, nobody gets. And I'd only partake in 2 activities: voting and writing. No dinners, public events, etc. that might taint the experiment.

Of course, this could never happen because the website I have right now uses phrases like 'cunt party' and talks shit about American Idol, so I'd never have the credibility to get elected, but still... I think about it.

And, in my thinking, I decided to check out other local politicians' websites to see how they use them. Are they interactive? Is it just a bio, some exposition and some photos? Are other people concerned about this cunt party that's going around? Are there mentions of bukkake, Coldstone Creameries and Paula Abdul?  I had to know.

One of the zillions* of sites I visited was run by this campaign for Congress.

So, here's my question / single political comment of the day before I move on to more trivial issues. Say your middle name is 'Bitter' and you're running for public office... don't you leave it off the poster? Or are you trying to appeal to a demographic that consists mainly of angry, unfuckable old people who spend the majority of their time either telling kids to get off their lawn or writing letters to CBS about Janet Jackson's titty? Really... who sees the name 'Bitter' and thinks, "Jesus fucking Crack... I'm getting on board"? Is this campaign managed by Murray Hewitt? 'Bitter' has about as much appeal as a 6-hour car ride with a rabid puma.

I'm sure she's a competent leader and very skilled at blah blah whatever. I don't know the woman personally. I'm just saying... damn... middle initials are your friend.

Okay, now on to today's scheduled trivial matter.

I was eating some steak last night with my family and my kid turned to me and asked me.... seriously asked me... whether or not steak came in bacon flavor.

95% of the day, my kids are flying around the house with their wings and flaming tridents raising all matter of cain everywhere they venture and I'm trying to sort out whether or not my wife had an affair with a hell-banished leviathan before they were born. The other 5% of the time, they're asking about bacon-flavored steak and I remember that they're mine.

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* Not really zillions